| May 7, 1999 |
|
Home | Nose | Arts & Fucking Features | Sports | Facts | Intelligent/Hyper-Asinine | Information | Archive
Ops Quiz: Know Your Fred Sontag
T.S. Eliot
It’s a pun. Get it? T.S.
ELiot! Ha ha ha! Ugh.Since none of you ungrateful bastards could find the time to write for us this year, we were forced to rely on our vast storehouse of Fred Sontag articles. We’d like to express our thanks by sharing with you the Sontag we know and love. [con't]
We’re Printing It, Conor, So Leave Us Alone
Conor Friedersdorf
Lonely Curmudgeon
Seven months ago we refused to publish this piece. Today we have no shame.
Now it is time for Ask Mr. Opinion Man.
Q. Mr. Opinion man, I am a psychology student doing research on annoying unoriginal morons with no sense of humor. I am very frustrated as I cannot find anyone to study. Do you have any recommendations? [con't]
It’s Time to Bust Some MDA Caps, Say Jer-Dogg and the DJP
By Jerry Lewis, as told to David Park
Comedian and Opinions Associate
It’s that time of year again.
The time of year with the chirping of the birds, and the flowers coming up and singing children skipping to-and-fro, fro-and-to, to-and-fro, fro-and-to, to-and-fro, fro-and-to, to-and-fro. They make me sick, like this campus that looks up to liberalism as its common gods. And naked women, who wil never let me get any.
Where the hell is my Percodan?
It’s that time of year again. [con't]
POLL POLL POLL POLL Where have all the women gone?*yes: 42% no: 59% PAC 5: 63%
Where have all the women gone?**
Where have all the queers gone?
*poll taken at Snack
|
Top