Sports Editor Kang Admits She is “Not That Into Sports”
By Nancy Drew
Investigative Reporter The TSL staff was appalled and betrayed late Wednesday night when sports editor Janice Kang ’04 let it slip that she was, “actually not that into sports.”

Kang, who professed to be an avid climber, surfer, and rugby player, eventually conceded that she goes to the climbing gym to “meet guys,” has only been surfing a few times (and never got up), and just manages the rugby team.

After the initial shock, fellow sports writers began to feel the full weight of the revelation. Seemingly impervious to the effect of her statement, Kang continued on, commenting that she, “didn’t think Pomona DIII athletics are that important, either.” The staff may have been shocked into silence before, but this last comment jocked them out of it. “How could she say P-P Sagehens aren’t important?!” shrieked Ezekial Pfiezer ’07. “I can’t work with this woman. I quit!”

“I don’t know how I didn’t see it,” said co-editor Hailey Anderson ’07. “I mean, it makes so much sense now. She always had some excuse for why she couldn’t come to the soccer game or go climbing with me.” Other associates were equally disillusioned. Lauren Sauter ’04 fought back tears as Kang rambled on, “Sports are just so BORING! “ She laughed callously. “I have much better things to do. Oh, my cell phone!”

As it is, with Pfiezer out the door and Sauter on the edge of a nervous breakdown, Kang will have a tough time winning back the confidence of her writing “team.” Anderson expressed her hesitation to continue working with Kang: “I don’t really feel comfortable talking to Janice about sports anymore, which is hard because she is still my co-editor. It’s nothing personal...I just don’t think she can understand where I’m coming from.”