Short Fiction: The Last Dinner Party
By Tony Tiu
Contributing Writer

May 15, 1999. Los Angeles, California. 4:38 pm.

Maria Fernandez had just had a really bad day. Sometimes she wonders how she got here. She never thought that she’d end up a single mom in her forties, still working long hours at the accounting firm. She was the brightest student in her high school, and remarkably, the most accomplished math student in her college too. But she never wanted to become an accountant, and never expected to become partner; it just paid so much more than being a high school teacher. Nevertheless, her day was finally over. She worked overnight last night so that she could leave earlier from the office today. Today, after all, was Andres’ birthday. He’s turning 12 today. It’s been a long 12 years. Maria was home now, and everything should be fine, unless the caterer is late. Sure, it’s just a small party, with only 11 guests (one of the invitees backed out the last minute) but well, Maria didn’t have time, and she wanted everything to be right.

Ding-dong. The doorbell rang. “Hi, Shen’s catering?” Maria welcomed Shen in. He was slightly worried that she’d be difficult; these big corporate types are always so demanding, but one look at her warm smile and all his anxiety faded into the background. This wouldn’t be a problem at all. “I’m sorry I’m slightly late. There was a lot of traffic,” he said. “Oh, that’s ok. I think there’s an accident on the 101 again. I’m sure we’ll have enough time. The party doesn’t officially begin till five anyway, and only four of the guests are here. The kids are out swimming in pool in the back,” she responded. “So do you have everything that I’ve ordered?”

“Yes I do. We were short on streamers, but I bought some on the way here.” Shen thought, “A nice place here, I thought it would be kind of harsh and desolate. Maybe this time he wants to live in style.” Maria said, “Let me give you a hand. Here, follow me.” So they brought in the salads, the burgers, and everything that Maria had ordered. Maria helped out, even though she didn’t need to (he was the hired hand, afterall), but Shen wasn’t going to complain. Shen filled the balloons with helium, and Maria taped up the banner: “Happy 12th birthday, Andres!” Between the two of them, the setup didn’t take long at all, even if Andres was interrupting them every couple of minutes to announce that more of the guests have arrived. “Where’s Janet?” Andres kept asking himself. By 5:20, everything was good to go. So yes, they did end up a bit late, but hey, they “can’t start without Janet!” who was late.

Soon they sang the birthday song. And soon they cut the cake, and everyone took a slice, except for Shen. “I’m a Buddhist,” he said, “I’m a vegan and don’t eat egg products.” Maria understood and respected his reverence for life. The bad day is ending up nicely. It’s good to see that the kids are having such a good time. It’s good to see that they were enjoying themselves. Maria and Shen sat in the kitchen and rested while the kids moved into the living room to play video games. “So, good party?” Shen asked. ”Yeah,” Maria said, and she continued, “Hey, I know you’re a Buddhist, but, do you believe in angels? I mean, angels that come and go and intervene and interfere with everyday life?” Shen said, “Well, I guess it’s more accurate to say I was raised a Buddhist. Some habits I still keep, others I don’t. I’ve seen far too many things in this life to really subscribe to any one particular religion, to be honest.” Maria said, “Far too many things? You don’t look more than 25 years old.” Shen: “Well, actually, I don’t look more than 23 years old. But that’s another story. Funny you should mention angels, actually. I’ve had some experiences myself. What’s your story, Ms. Fernandez?”

“Thank you, by the way, for addressing me that way. I can’t tell you how irritating it is for people to refer to me to Mrs. Fernandez, like they think I’ve inherited all this from a dead husband or something,” said Ms. Fernandez. “Ah. Well I didn’t see any pictures of older husbands on my way in.” Shen observed. “Well, my‘story’ if you want to call it that, is this. Twelve years ago, before I had Andres, I was in a supermarket, and this couple, a young man and a young woman, came up to me, held my hand, and told me that I was going to do something great. That my son was going to do something great, and that they would be watching out for me. It was really weird. No one knew that I was pregnant at the time except my for doctor.” “Well, that is weird,” Shen agreed. “They said they were my angels. And you know what, I felt… so warm around them that I believed them.” Maria continued. “I have only ever been in love once, but unfortunately it didn’t work out. Somewhere along the way, I decided that I wasn’t going to wait to have a child. You see, Andres there? He was artificially inseminated.” Maria said.”“So you never made the connection?” Shen said. “What connection?” “Are you a religious woman?” Shen inquired. “Well, I was raised Catholic, if that tells you anything.” Shen nodded, and said, “So it was like Andres was immaculately conceived.” Maria said “You could say that… what, those really were angels, and they were going to protect me and my son because my son is God?” Shen replied “Well, they were going to do that, but we took care of them. We just took care of the Anti-Christ too. Ms. Fernandez, this is quite obvious, I suppose, the world is far too important to end. I have a lot of stock, you see, and one day they might be worth something.”

“What?” Maria said, in shock. “Are you serious?”

“I am.” Shen said. “You know, God has tried to fulfill his prophecy for a long long time, and we’ve been interrupting him. This is the fourth time in fact. We’ve … well, the people that I work for anyway, have narrowed his coming to mathematical precision. The first time was almost as it was exactly predicted, a little boy born off the coast of Spain in the 11th century. The second time was in the exact same fishing town 12 years after we killed him. The third time, he was a she, and God almost narrowly escaped. Well, the fourth time, here we are.”

“What, are you going to kill us?” Maria asked.

“No. I killed him, and you, and his closest friends, 30 minutes ago, when you ate that birthday cake. You should feel it soon. In twenty minutes the helium tanks will explode, and the fire department will unfortunately be occupied elsewhere. I’m sorry, Ms. Fernandez, but the world is not quite ready to end yet.”