Capitalist Fatcats!
By Nathan H. Fisher
A&F Editor

After lengthy consideration, the thing that pisses me off most about this college is the jerks who subscribe to the New York Times who just had to have their precious subscriptions held for them in the coop store where no one else can read them. Now, if you subscribe to and read the New York Times everyday then, you know, more power to you. I think that's great. But you seem to me to be in the minority of the prissy kids who, for whatever prissy reason, get the Times daily only to pick it up sporadically, if at all.

For the longest time, I would stop by the campus center after class (it's always afternoon, since I don't do morning class) and pick up one of the Times that hadn't been claimed yet. They'd just be sitting out by the mailroom, unclaimed, just sort of waiting for me. "Please," they'd practically cry out, "don't you want to know about your world?" Well, yes. Yes I do.

I like the New York Times; it's as informative as any of the for-profit media, it's the newspaper of record in the United States and their front-page layout is somewhat of a standard bearer for those of us at The Student Life.

And, it's a freaking daily. If you haven't picked up your newspaper by 4 p.m., shame on you. Let someone else read it.

But, of course, people complained. The requisite confrontation between the haves and the have-nots ensued. There was even a notorious digester post from a guy who implored people to stop taking his Times because he "spends hundreds of dollars" on his subscription . This pissed me off, since it seems to me that there are good reasons and bad reasons for asking people to stop swiping your paper. "I read the newspaper everyday and want to stay informed" is a good reason. "I spend literally hundreds of dollars on my subscription because I'm so important and ostentatiously display wealth" is a bad reason.

So now the New York Times subscriptions sit behind the Coop store counter, safe at last. And there are always several unclaimed copies at the end of the day, unread, useless. A day old newspaper is seriously less valuable than it was just one day ago. Adding insult to injury, many who had a problem with people picking up their newspapers didn't and probably still don't read their copies at all. Congratulations, jackasses, you've helped restrict the freedom of the press just a little bit. You've helped keep others in the dark while you squander your privilege.