Interview Yields Blah Blah Blah, NWA Proud
By Dan Driscoll
TSL Sports Writer at Large

TSL correspondent at large Dan Driscoll brings you an exclusive interview with the captain of Pomona's new cheerleading squad, Bridgit Titmeister '04.
Dan: Thanks for meeting with me Bridgit.
Tiff: Oh, no problem Dan.
Dan: And on behalf of the entire male student body of this college, but most especially myself, thankyou thankyou thankyou for starting this cheerleading team.
Tiff: Um, yeah. Well we thought, you know, that it was really lame that every other college in America has a cheerleading squad and we just don't. I mean how are people supposed to have school spirit when they don't cheerleaders?
Dan: Golly, I just don't know. Is that a wonderbra?
Tiff: Um, no, it's just my uniform. Anyway, aren't you supposed to ask me questions about the team?
Dan: Oh right, right. So, Bridgit, what gave you the inspiration to start Pomona's first ever cheerleading squad?
Tiff: Well it all started this one day on my grandpa's farm. Blah, blah, blah. Blah blah blah. Blah blah. Blah- Are you even writing this down?!!
Dan: Oh! Um, right yeah… I mostly take notes in the old noggin here. I have a photographic memory you know. It's my gift. It's my curse.
Tiff: Whatever, we're supposed to be talking about me. You know, cheerleading is hard. A lot of people just think it's about make-up and pom-poms but it's not, it's a real sport. They even have it on ESPN.
Dan: High school nationals, 7 p.m. Eastern, 10 p.m. Pacific on ESPN 2. Say Tiff baby, why don't we continue this conversation in Disco's private apartamente…
Tiff: Gag me with a spoon, you creep.
Dan: Oh come on, it's late, just about time for bed….for two. [He yawns, winks, and stretches his arm around Titmeister's shoulders.]
Tiff: That's it!
Dan: You mean that's where it's at! [points to crotch.] [Incidently, crotch is covered with only a leaf.]
[Titmeister kicks Dan in the crotch. Dan whimpers.]
Tiff: Ew! That is the last time I fall for that "press interview" bullshit. I'm leaving!

[No actual members of TSL were harmed in the making of this article.]