I Spy, you Spy, We All Spy a Poorly Made Feature Film
By Jonathan Schwartz
A&F Writer

I Spy, the new spy thriller/ buddy comedy directed by Betty Thomas (28 Days) is that worst of Hollywood products: a film that undermines and distracts from its own strengths. While she certainly isn’t helped by an incoherent, laugh-track ready screenplay, Thomas ignores the life preserver she has in her two talented stars, and thereby dooms her project to the cinematic bargain bin.

The “plot” of I Spy revolves around Alexander Scott (Owen Wilson), a second rate government spy who has a nauseatingly cute crush on fellow agent Rachel (Famke Janssen). Scott is sent to Budapest along with—for completely meaningless reasons— current heavyweight boxing champion Kelly Robinson (Eddie Murphy) to track down an invisible plane that could destroy the world. Along the way, they encounter evil enemy agents, double crosses, and engage in delightfully heteronormative hi-jinx.

The intro (and inordinately brief title sequence) includes a nice riff on the Bond theme, reworked to sound exactly like the soundtrack to the popular Super Mario Bros. 3 videogame. Wilson’s scenes at his headquarters with rival spy Carlos (Gary Cole) aren’t bad, and his generically ritualistic inspection of his mission equipment provides some easy laughs. In this early stage, Murphy’s relentless grandstands are charming rather than aggravating.

Unfortunately, the promise of its first ten minutes is in no way realized by the final eighty-six. Saddled with an unwieldy television license and this wholly trite and unimaginative premise, the least Thomas could have done would have been to allow Murphy and Wilson a little more screen time in which to bounce their characters off one another. In an effort no doubt calculated to suck all possible pleasure out of the film, however, the director instead chooses to double back on every ounce of I Spy’s potential. Hints at genre parody and high-minded intertextual critique are suborned to exploding pagers and tired chase scenes. Any possible surprise in the script is backgrounded in comparison to the totally humorless and stuttering climactic showdown.

Yes, I Spy has the requisite action scenes and explosives, but these are reduced to spectacle rather sublimated as comedy. As such, they distract from the buddy comedy foundation of the film, breaking up moments of chemistry for strictly by-the-numbers gunfights and chases. A lot of money gets thrown at these set pieces, but they clearly belong in a different movie. At times, Thomas recognizes the necessity of playing with the nature of these action scenes in order to preserve her film’s light-hearted feel, but too often the action is presented straight-up for its own visual pleasure, and in these moments the film stumbles badly.

The worst of Thomas’ crimes, however, lies in her treatment of Wilson and Murphy. The two have a semblance of chemistry that hints at what they could have accomplished together in a film that deserved their presence. Scott tells Robinson early on that his constant mugging and ridiculous self-absorption will become annoying, and this prediction is prescient both for him and for the audience. Robinson’s buffoonish superiority complex definitely takes the “buddy” out of buddy comedy, and the film simply becomes an extended, monotonous attempt by Scott to get through to Robinson, broken up by extraneous and disengaged action sequences.

Much as it pains me to admit it, though, I Spy has its moments. When Murphy and Wilson manage to transcend the “Stop being stupid!” “What? I couldn’t hear you because I was (and still am) being stupid” basis of their relationship, there are flashes of genuine humor that seem forced onto the audience by the sheer will and talent of the stars.