When Tom went to college, his mother gave him a little knowledge. She proclaimed, "Work and play during the day my boy, but sleep tight at night." Eight hours of sleep create a wealthy, healthy productive boy. And Tom tried as he might to go to bed at 10 p.m. every night.

However, a bit-bang-boom came into his room. Squeaky bed springs sounded through the wall, to leave Tom wondering about it all. Not to mention the girl who took late night showers in the bathroom by Tom’s window, singing so loud that even good-hearted Tom had to glower. Once work started, Tom and his plans for rest parted. Tired, sleepy and overworked Tom was not Tom at all, but a shell of boy passed out in the hall.

But one day Tom decided to take a break, not work, not play, but perhaps lay in his bed a moment. Slowly, his eyes drooped, heavier and heavier. He fell asleep, a deep, restful, California sleep. In a few hours Tom woke up, confused, was it morning? Did he have class? Where was he? As he came to his senses, Tom felt suddenly good and aware and was Tom again. What was it that he had found?

Had Tom discovered No-Doz? No. Had Tom joined a cult? Probably not. Tom had discovered Napping! Just like any good Pomona student, Tom followed the age old dictum "If you can’t do it now, do it later" and so his sleep went. Energized and recovered Tom had discovered all sorts of things about Pomona that he didn’t know. People getting naked in the fountain, the college is at the base of a mountain and so many other things that he just had to stop countin’.

Amazed at his newfound powers, Tom finally talked to the girl in the shower and ended all glowers. Strengthened by three more hours of sleep a day, Tom had to say, "If I nap once a day and I feel this good, what about twice or thrice a day." So Tom started binge napping. Every day he would take a three-hour nap for every six hours that he was awake. Falling into this 36 hour trap slowly made Tom snap. He did not know if it was night or day and, when his mother called, he did not know what to say.

"What did you do today my boy?" she asked, wondering if he had turned into a nappie who drinks soy. "Today" he would respond rather fond of such a useless term in his newfound rendezvous with napping. His mother, rather appalled, called Dean Quinley and expressed her concern. "I think my boy’s been doing drugs," she said, "I worry and worry that he will come back to me unshaven and furry." Dean Quinley assured Tom’s mother that it is natural in college to be furry, for why be in such a hurry?

Tom could not keep up this schedule very long, for his performance in class was not very strong. A 36-hour schedule, though enjoyable, was not very practical. So Tom looked outside and saw purple skies, then he decided maybe I’ll just try to sleep for a little while. Tom went to bed and rested his head for a good eight hours. Waking up, Tom went to classes refreshed and decided that he would make a new schedule worthy of the Ganesh.

"Six hours of sleep during the night will keep me bright," he thought, "but an extra three hours of napping during the day will let me play," he exclaimed. So Tom went back to his room and went under the covers and suddenly discovered how to live.

So good night mountain, goodnight naked nappies in the fountain, good night squeaky bedsprings, goodnight phone rings, goodnight singer the shower, goodnight glower, goodnight mom and goodnight Tom.